This is the kitchen where we talk about food, life, and recovery—a spiritual path to healing and peace.

You are invited to keep coming back to A Cup of Kindness to share your experience, strength and hope; fears, doubts and insecurities; and to pick up information, inspiration … and have a little fun!

My story
In January 2007, at the age of 51, I joined a 12-step program and began my recovery from food addiction, losing 75 pounds in the process. Read more…

In January 2011, at the age of 55, I began my recovery from a multi-trauma accident, 36 fractures, damaged lungs, and post traumatic stress. Read more…

I am deeply grateful for all the kindnesses, large and small, offered to me in recovery. Here I am... alive… still making progress … still not perfect … finding a new way forward in a growing community of women and men who share a lot in common around food and life.

I hope you'll join me in this kitchen and let me know what's cooking with you.

A Cup of Kindness

Open Heart Project




This morning my mind went briefly towards the old catastrophizing I used to do. I began to worry about something and then there was a calm, quiet voice that said, “Wait a minute. I could prepare for peace, not fear.”

If I practice fear, I make progress towards fear. If I practice peace, I make progress towards peace.

Fear can be my friend, as long as I note the fear and ask myself what part of it is a rational concern at this moment. Not an imaginary concern that just feels real. What is the concern that makes sense due to direct observation? And if there is a rational concern at this moment, what can I do about it? What steps can I take?

The first step I can always take, whether I’m in rational or irrational worry, doubt, fear or insecurity, is to sit quietly and ask for help from my Higher Power. I can pray with passion and determination. I can call a 12-step fellow. (I don’t need to go to my husband every time. He’ll think I’m crazy. My fellow food addicts will understand what I’m saying here.) I can speak to my therapist. I can read some spiritual literature. I can write about it. If it’s a health-related fear, I can call the doctor.

I don’t have to eat over it; or intensify it with fear-based entertainment; or convince anyone of the “truth” of my fear.

I can decide to distract myself with a more healthy pursuit than dwelling in fear. I can train my attention on another object. I can walk in Nature, look up at the trees and the stars. How many millions of years have trees grown on this Earth? How many billions of years have these stars existed in the Universe? How many people have lived and died underneath them? How small is my life compared to the vastness of time and space?

I can make a gratitude list. I can practice yoga, or cook, or listen to the ringing of a great bell… with the intention to practice peace.

As I heard in a meeting this morning, peace is our spiritual DNA. We are made for peace.

Here’s a lovely video made for peace. One of our fellows shared it with me today. I enjoyed it very much (including the misspellings). I’ll keep this one on hand and watch it again.

Thank you.

Love & Light,



2 Comments to Peace

  1. Cathryn's Gravatar Cathryn
    July 22, 2012 at 10:07 pm | Permalink

    Thank you for sharing this video with us, Valerie- it is very beautiful and inspiring.

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