I’m very happy to report that a settlement was reached and signed yesterday in the case of my accident of January 18, 2011.
This is good news in every way!
I’m reassured that all parties were people of good will; and that, once our expert witnesses presented their reports, the fairest outcome was clear and acceptable to everyone.
I’m thankful that the driver of the car agreed to make a contribution of his time, effort, and/or energy to the local chapter of Mothers Against Drunk Driving to benefit drunk driving awareness and education in the community. I know this will make a positive difference. It might even save a life.
Gregory and I are just beginning to learn about what the economic implications are for our future. Suffice it to say that we have trusted advisers who are guiding us into a lifetime of financial security.
There is a gentleman’s and gentlewoman’s agreement that the driver and I will have a phone conversation in the near future. I’d like to “meet” him under better circumstances. I want him to know that I have forgiven him unconditionally. I want to know how he’s doing; how his family is doing; what this has been like for him; and what he’s doing to recover. I will do my best to answer any questions he may have of me.
My great gratitude goes to Gregory for seeking out and finding our law firm, Indiano & Williams. The whole firm, especially David Indiano, Jeff Williams and Seth Erbe have been incredibly supportive. All the way along, they treated us with the utmost respect, as equal partners in the process. At every stage, they wanted to make sure that my first priority was getting as healthy and strong as possible. While we had many substantive conversations that required extensive explanation, there were also conversations that were more philosophical, spiritual, and just plain fun. I always had complete confidence that we would achieve the best possible outcome with the leadership of Indiano & Williams on the case.
So now, Gregory and I get to focus on our wedding and honeymoon! Ain’t that sweet!
Love & Light,
Valerie
what amazes me is that all this was accomplished with the least amount of anger and blame
it speaks volumes about all parties concerned.
I agree, Myra!!! It is a testament to the potential for human kindness and forgiveness. I am so happy for Valerie and Gregory as they can focus on their lives now, moving forward. And I do hope that the driver uses the lesson of forgiveness to pay it forward in his life, doing what he can to prevent similar accidents from happening to others…. Amazing, the amount of beauty, goodness, and growth that Valerie has found and shared through this otherwise terrible event in life.
Thank you, Kit. Love & Light, Valerie
That is wonderful news, Valerie. The best possible outcome. Congratulations and all best wishes for the future.
Thank you, Debra. I agree. It was the best possible outcome. We are so grateful. As for the future, we hope to let our lives speak. Parker Palmer says, “Before you tell your life what you intend to do with it, listen for what it intends to do with you. Before you tell your life what truths and values you have decided to live up to, let your life tell you what truths you embody, what values you represent.” We are in a listening mode. Love & Light, Valerie
Hi Mom, I agree. It took some patience, but as I keep learning, in G-d’s time all things are possible. Love & Light, Valerie
Harry, BuddyLee, Bridgie and I are so happy that this abundant relief is coming your way after a long and difficult ordeal for the three of you and your loving family!
Dear Katherine, Harry, BuddyLee and Bridgie, We are happy, too, and so glad to share the joy! See you soon. Love & Light, Valerie
Dear Valerie,
I am so glad to hear of the resolution of this. Now your your energies and be focused elsewhere. Barbara and I are very much looking forward to celebrating you and Gregory in May!
Thank you, Mark! See you soon. Love & Light, Valerie
I agree with Myra. What makes this news especially great is the lack of animosity between the parties. It is wonderful to see such a traumatic experience be resolved in a way that becomes enlightening. It is a special testament to you, Valerie, that all this is possible. Your perspective on life is nothing short of amazing, and I can only hope to learn from it.
All my best from Boston!
Hi Wendy! Yes. I agree, too. You put it very well. What worried me most about the possible trial was an escalation of animosity. I’m not perfect. I had my days of resentment. It just didn’t do me any good at all. Opening one’s heart feels so much better. Love & Light to you and yours in Boston, Valerie
Wonderful news to have now passed this huge milestone and to be able to move on into the future without financial worries hanging over you and Gregory.
I think your positive attitude towards the driver is amazing and I’m sure it’s helped you in your overall recovery.
Enjoy your wedding and honeymoon planning – that will be fun for sure.
Very best wishes
Anne
Hi Anne! Thank you, thank you, thank you! I saw someone on the street the other day and thought it was you. My heart leaped! Oh well. I know we’ll see each other again someday. Please keep me posted on your doings. Love & Light, Valerie
Oh Valerie,
This is such wonderful news!!! And you are so full of grace and compassion I am in awe!!! Congratulations on the wonderful outcome and loads of happiness on planning your wedding and honeymoon. I can’t wait to hear about them both!!!
Love Rachel
Thank you, Rachel! I’m starting to feel the joy. I want to say, “Let the good times roll!” Love & Light, Valerie
Beautiful! Congratulations on walking through this so gracefully. Happy planning 🙂
Thank you, Jena. As I read your words on graceful walking I immediately saw an image of you in your graceful walking. I aspire to that walk — spiritually, as well as physically. Love & Light, Valerie
Just reading this humbles me. This is what recovery looks like: physical, emotional, and spiritual. Conngratulations Valerie!
Dearest Elayne, Thank you for your kind words. You know where I’m learning to grow. And you are a big part of it. Love & Light, Valerie
Wow! Congratulations and Happy Birthday Valerie!
What a nice present to have all of the legal stuff behind you. Your forgiving and loving approach has turned an unpleasant experience into a positive one. You may have saved the life of the man who injured you- at the very least he has a chance to get treatment. What a positive outcome of this awful experience. I wish everyone could have your wisdom and compassion. It is also nice to hear about your wonderful legal counsilors. There are so many concerned, professional people who represent and fight for us every day, but have to hear that all lawyers are bad. The deserve better.
Thanks for sharing the great news. Have fun planning your wedding and everything that is fun. Your certainly deserve it- you continue to inspire me. Forgiveness does not come without going through pain. I am so glad you are on the other side of all that now and can start a new chapter.
Have the best birthday Valerie and congrats!
love,Betsy M
Thanks, Betsy! A new chapter, indeed. I’m still trying to wrap my head around it… in a fun way. Love you. Love & Light, Valerie
And, of course – HAPPY BIRTHDAY! 🙂
YAAAAAAAAAY!!!!!!!!!
Dear Valerie,
What makes this such great news, to me, is the way your posting is perfumed with graciousness and gratitude. You’ve struggled so to maintain your faith throughout this dark journey, and you had already lit your own way by the time this sunny news about the settlement arrived.
I hope this truly helps bring you the closure you are seeking and paves the way for a smoother future…
Much love,
Marilyn
Dear Marilyn, Thank you for putting this experience into such beautiful prose. It’s wonderful to be understood. I did struggle to find and keep my faith through many a dark day. As my dad used to say, “Be a lamp unto yourself.” That’s the only way. Love & Light, Valerie
Congratulations! This is wonderful news!!
Thanks, Susan! It is truly awesome… in the grandest sense of the word. Love & Light, Valerie
Dear Valerie and Gregory– I’m so happy and relieved for the two of you. I’m blinking back tears reading the news of the settlement. It is glorious news! I’m also happy for your family — both mom, sister and friends who have been praying for this outcome.
Please call me when you catch your breath…
Their is a cup of tea at Teaism with you name on it.
LOVE YOU!!!!!
Dear Joy, As the hours pass and the messages come through with congratulations, I am becoming happier and happier. It truly is wonderful news. I said to Gregory this evening, there couldn’t have been a better outcome. It’s just taking some adjustment to my thinking about who I am and what my life is about. Maybe the tea leaves in a cuppa at Teaism might tell me something. Love you, too!!! Love & Light, Valerie
Oh yes! And Happy Birthday, Valerie. And Many MORE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
YIPPPEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!
Valerie,
I am a friend of your dear friend, Susan Waite. I have been following your journey to recovery and now enjoy your A Cup of Kindness site. I am beyond thrilled for your settlement news. You are truly a strong, courageous, kind, spiritual woman!! I admire you in so many ways and look forward to reading and learning from each of your entries. I wept through so many of the entries shared on your CaringBridge site–for months!! I was visiting another CaringBridge site during the first 3 months of your recovery, so I checked in with your site daily, after Susan told me about your accident. My heart sings for every physical, psychological and emotional hurdle you have cleared and I so admire your determination to continue to heal your mind and body, even when you think you’ve taken a few steps back!!
What fun and freedom for you to be able to expend your time and energy into the planning of your wedding, honeymoon and future, moving further and further away from the nightmare of last January!!
Peace be with you!!
Liz Thorson
Kirkland, WA
Dear Liz, How wonderful! I feel like I have a new friend… and friends are very precious to me. Thank you for walking with me through this journey. You are right — it is fun and freeing to share this happy news and turn our attention towards our love for each other and for our friends. I hope you’ll stay in touch and offer your insights again. Love & Light, Valerie
this is wonderful news for all, i’m so pleased! it all DOES work in mysterious ways. what wonderful birthday news! now onward and upward!
Hi Mary! Yes onward and upward and, as a friend said here recently, from strength to strength. Love & Light, Valerie
The legal system at its best. Happy birthday, and God bless you and Gregory as you seal your life together.
Hi Renee, I just said this a few minutes ago to a neighbor who is a superb neurosurgery nurse practitioner and now in law school. I said we have really benefited from a legal system at its best and our wonderful lawyers. Many thanks for your good wishes. Love & Light, Valerie
CONGRATULATIONS!! Valerie and Gregory, I am so happy for both of you. You two have been through a lot to say the least. I admire your strength, perseverance and faith. So glad you can move forward with this part behind you. I think of you often, do enjoy a cup of kindness and keep you both in prayer. WOW is all I can really say. Me, Mary lost for words! But thankful. HAPPY BIRTHDAY! You are such an inspiration to me. Much love to you both.
Hi Mary! Thank you so much. It’s great to hear from you. I love that you are enjoying a cup of kindness and keeping us in prayer. I’m truly grateful. Love & Light, Valerie
What great news to have this chapter behind you as you move into a new chapter of your lives! So many have expressed views that I share – the power of forgiveness and maybe reconciliation if the driver is willing/able to follow up with your gentle agreement – all parties entering into a collaborative process and seeking justice and fairness – and most of all, celebrating your recovery and increasing health given the seriousness of your injuries. Look forward to sharing more joy on May 19th!
Thank you, Joan. It is good timing. I feel like I can breathe a little easier and turn, turn, turn my attention with the season to new growth. See you soon. Love & Light, Valerie
So very sweet, Valerie, all around. Thank Goodness 🙂
Hi Michelle. Yes. Sweet goodness. Good words. Thank you. Love & Light, Valerie
YAYYYYY!!!!!
xxoo
Thank you, Melinda!!!!!!!!!!!!
I am so glad to have this good news. Like so many of your followers, I too have felt your grace and forgiveness throughout this process. I love your shares, and learn something each time. I think you are living the serenity prayer!
Dear Alison, The serenity prayer saved my troubled mind early on in my recovery from the accident. It was only because of practicing it over and over again during my recovery from food addiction that I even knew it and it came to me in my worst moments… with insight following. By the Grace of Higher Power, forgiveness was just there. I never had to seek it. Love & Light, Valerie